I can stop whenever I want

HOW YOU LIVE CHANGES YOUR BRAIN.
We tend to believe that the mind affects the body and the body affects the mind, although we do not generally believe that everything we do affects the brain. I am convinced that if someone was to yell at me from across the street my brain could be affected and my life might changed. That is why your mother always said, ‘Don’t hang out with those bad kids.’ Mama was right. Thought changes our life and our behaviour.

I have taken to reading political bloggers with a ferocity and an investment of self that surprises even me. Folks like Digby, Steve Gilliard, Kos, and Juan Cole occupy a stunningly large portion of my daily mental calisthenics, often against my will. They are a form of mild candy-coated stimulant - softening the higher brain functions, focusing energy, riling passions. Outrages and implausible hypocracy are laid before me in a delectable smorgasbord of political diatribe. I can hunt and pick through endless articles, sampling every variety of righteous anger until I find the morsels I can really savor.

And when I tire of the rush of carbs and sweets I can jump on over to Red State, Powerline, or Little Green Footballs for my meaty tenderloin steak of outrage. I can peruse the Daou Report, experience every recipe on the menu for partisan hatred and walk away with a more distinguished, experienced palette on which to build my personal belief system.

Now, obviously I enjoy and respect a lot of the writing and commentary on the first batch of blogs - that's what draws me to them. There is nothing wrong with indulging in the writers that you like. And there's also nothing wrong with taking a long look at the words and beliefs of the people you're likely to disagree with - that second set. In fact it's the intellectually honest thing to do. But the problem is, after gorging on both sides of the issues and listening to the vindictiveness for so long, you can't stop. It becomes a part of you. And if that vindictiveness brews into a solid hatred, well good rarely comes of that.

Hatred is a poison. Many people in political talking circles have fallen to it. Hard. They've fallen so far that they can't make reasonable judgements about anything because their decisions are ruled by their hatreds.

I came to the realization recently that I hate Republicans. I want to make this perfectly clear - I don't have anything against conservative thinking. Liberalism, conservativism, whatever, those things don't matter to me because rational people can debate ideology in rational ways. I'm also not a Democrat or a member of any other political group. But I hate the Republican party. I hate what they do and say, I hate what they supposedly stand for. I think the Republican leadership is morally bankrupt, un-American, and motivated by evil self-interest and they need to be stopped. Fuck them all.

I don't want to hate anyone. Hatred is not something that comes easily, or at least it shouldn't. Mom always used to say not to use the word hate. It's too powerful. You can dislike, not care for, disparage, rue, even sneer at something, but don't toss around HATE lightly. But there it is - a swollen, pus-filled ripe boil of anger and resentment directed squarely at the heart of the Republican party.

And I'm not keen on popping it any time soon.

It's not clear where exactly the hate came from. Either people started doing far more outrageous and horrible things in the last few years that really got me going, or the Internet has simply made them more accessible. We could just switch off the Ethernet connection and drift in blissful silence and darkness to bleed off a little hate I suppose, but as in the Abu Gharib scandal, the problem isn't the cameras, it's the abuse. I have resigned myself to keep hating as long as they keep doing hateful things. When they stop, hopefully I'll be able to stop as well, but I'm probably in for a long, unpleasant wait. I wish there were another way out that didn't involve giving up on my own principles and beliefs - the "ability to accept the things I cannot change." Some of us are not so gracious to posess such humility.

So with that cathartic element on the table for all to see (and the FBI now monitoring the page for anti-American sentiment, thank you Patriot Act), I pledge to all readers thus: there will be no more overt political posts on Escapism Artist. I'm going to purge the hatred from this outlet. No links, no discussion, no commentary. Stuff will show up in the comments listings I'm sure, but the petty hatreds of mortal politics will no longer tread on the other content of this blog.

I'll just post excessive diatribes on Jason's. I'm sure he'll appreciate that.